


save you

by hipgrab (merrymegtargaryen)



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-19
Updated: 2018-02-19
Packaged: 2019-03-21 02:54:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13731618
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/merrymegtargaryen/pseuds/hipgrab
Summary: The Force bond materializes at a bad time. Rey thinks Ben will make good on his promise to destroy her, but he surprises her.





	save you

**Author's Note:**

> Listen I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS IS. I didn't want to write it but it just KEPT WRITING ITSELF. So. Here you go. 
> 
> I love comments and I'd love constructive criticism for this fic, so please let me know what you think!

Rey swung her saberstaff down, cutting through the white stormtrooper armor and sending the soldier in a graceless heap on the forest floor. She heard the pound of footsteps and whirled around, disarming her opponent and sending him to join his comrade. Rey panted, taking in her surroundings. She had lost sight of the other rebels, and the sounds of combat were distant. How far had she strayed from the battle? She looked up, trying to gauge her location from the position of the Resistance fleet, and was shocked to see how far away they were. She’d known she’d been covering ground when she was charging after the stormtroopers, but that far? She was too far out for reinforcements, should she need them--she needed to turn back now. 

As if her thoughts had willed it into being, a noise came from behind Rey, the sound of feet tearing across the forest floor. She whipped around, the humming blue light of her saberstaff deflecting a blaster shot, and then charged at her attacker. She was nearly upon him when pain blossomed on her left hip. She cried out, her leg collapsing from under her and taking her down to the ground. Another stormtrooper, one she hadn’t seen sneak up on her, shot her with his blaster. She reacted just in time to deflect two blaster bolts; she reached for her own blaster and took down the stormtrooper that had snuck up on her. She saw the other aim his blaster and grimaced; clenching her teeth, she let out a strangled scream as she vaulted to her feet and plunged her saber into his chest. She collapsed just a second after he did, landing on her right side and rolling to her back. The pain in her hip had only gotten worse--or perhaps she hadn’t allowed herself to feel it fully until she was out of danger. She touched a hand to the wound and cried out. It was bad. She was still alive, which was good, but she couldn’t move her left side, which was bad. 

She dragged herself to the nearest tree and propped herself up against it, gritting her teeth to keep from screaming again. There were black spots in her vision, and she knew that she was dangerously close to passing out. She fumbled for her commlink, but it had been tucked into her belt and it had gotten fried when the blaster hit her. She was stranded out here for who knew how long. Finn would notice she was gone, wouldn’t he? He’d surely try to look for her.

But as the pain sent more black spots in Rey’s vision, she wasn’t sure if she’d last that long. She knew that she had to remain conscious as long as possible, but her head was so heavy and the forest was starting to spin.

And that’s when she saw him.

They hadn’t shared a vision like this since she’d closed the  _ Millenium Falcon _ ’s door in his face--she’d kept up her defenses and he’d kept up his. Of course it was now, when she was weaker than ever, that he appeared to her like this.

“That you, Rey?” She couldn’t see his surroundings, just the dark expression on his face. At least, she thought it was dark; she was fighting to keep her eyes open, sweating with the effort. 

“Kindly fuck off,” she said, trying to turn away, but her side twinged and she let out a hiss.

“What happened?” Kriff, so he was still there.

“Blaster,” she ground out. 

She couldn’t be sure, but it looked as if he was frowning. “You’re hurt.”

“I’m fine. Think I’ll go for a walk,” she said, her eyes fluttering. Maker, but she was exhausted. 

“Don’t fall asleep,” he said sharply. “Where are you?”

“Why? So you can finish me off?” She shook her head, but this made her dizzy so she leaned back against the tree. “Nuh-uh.”

“Rey!” he practically shouted. “Stay awake! Where are you?”

“I don’t know,” she slurred. She tilted her head back to look at the sky and the First Order ships in it. “Can you see ‘at?”

“Yes. Don’t move. And don’t fall asleep.”

She was trying, really she was, but it was so hard. Her side was throbbing so hard it was exhausting her, and her head was becoming heavier and heavier. It took all her effort to wrench her eyes open, to not nod off as she so desired. 

She wasn’t sure how much time had passed—it could have been minutes or hours. All she knew was that she was hanging on by a thread when she felt his presence. 

“Ben,” she rasped, the name coming unbidden to her tongue. Her vision was so blurry now she only saw a black blur against the green forest. She was too tired and in too much pain to feel worried, to even reach for the saberstaff at her side. She only groaned when he knelt beside her.

He didn’t say anything as he lifted her into his arms, carrying her like he had the first time they’d met. Her head rolled onto his shoulder and stayed there as she finally succumbed to the blackness at the edge of her vision. 

.

She dreamed that she was reaching for something, that her hand was extending forward and trying to grasp something she couldn’t see but knew was there. She kept reaching and reaching, but she never quite got what she wanted. 

And then she woke up.

She was curled up, but the hand that had reached out in her dream was stretched out now, reaching for...something. She curled her fingers into her palm, pulled her hand close to her chest. What had she been reaching for? She knew it was just a dream, but it had felt like  _ more _ than a dream. It had felt  _ real _ . 

Then it hit her.

The blaster shot. 

The woods. 

_ Ben _ . 

She looked around her. He was nowhere in sight. She was on a First Order ship, that much was clear from the black and gray layout, but that was  _ all _ that was clear. Her blaster wound was  _ gone _ . As in, completely missing. She hadn’t... _ dreamt _ it, surely? But no, her shirt had a black, bloody hole, she’d definitely been shot. And, apparently, healed. By the First Order? What was she  _ doing _ here? Had Ben really carried her to a First Order vessel to...what, tend her wound? But why would he do that? The last time they’d seen each other, she’d slammed the  _ Falcon _ ’s door in his face. Was he waiting to kill her? Did he want one last duel where he could best her? Was it too insulting, for his opponent to die in the woods of a blaster wound? Was it some sort of possessiveness that led him to heal her, only so he could kill her honorably? It was the only justification she could think of. 

She was drifting off again when she felt it. When she felt  _ him _ . She turned her head and saw him standing in the doorway, an unreadable expression on his face. 

“How are you feeling?” he asked softly.

“What am I doing here?” she asked instead.

“You were injured.”

“Really? Thanks, I had no idea.” She winced at her own sarcasm. “I mean. How did the blaster shot just...go away?”

He tilted his head. “I healed you.”

“I see that,” she said with a touch of impatience. “But  _ how _ ?”

He snorted. “My uncle didn’t teach you? The Force can be used to heal.”

Rey didn’t know--she’d only spent a few hours with Luke, and healing had never come up in that time. “ _ You _ healed me?”

She could see the sarcastic reply rise to his lips, but he forced it down. “Yes.”

Rey shifted. “Why?”

He looked as if he didn’t understand the question.

“I wouldn’t join you when you asked me,” she said, softer. “I left you unconscious. You fired at the  _ Falcon _ when you knew I was on it. You could’ve left me to die on Endor, or you could’ve finished me off then and there. Why take me here and keep me alive?”

He was quiet for so long she wondered if she’d only imagined asking the question. But finally, he said, “I couldn’t let you die.”

“Couldn’t  _ let _ me?”

He shrugged. “No. Even if I wanted to.”

She furrowed her brow. “What do you mean?”

He was quiet for a moment. “Before I met you, I was so lonely. In almost thirty years, you were the first person I ever met as lonely as I was. And suddenly I wasn’t lonely anymore. Surely you felt it too.”

She dropped her gaze. “Yes.”

He moved forward, closer to the bed. “Rey.”

She looked up at him again.

Slowly, he sat on the edge of her bed. “We’re bound, you and I. I couldn’t kill you anymore than I could kill myself. You’re a part of me.”

_ And you’re a part of me _ , she thought.  _ You’ve always been a part of me _ . 

“What happens now?” she asked aloud.

“Whatever you want,” he murmured. 

She shook her head. “I don’t think what I want is possible.”

He was quiet for a moment. “I think you’d be surprised by what’s possible.”

“But this isn’t possible, Ben.” She could feel her eyes pricking with tears. “I want to go back to my friends, to the Resistance. I want to destroy the First Order...but I want you at my side while I do it.”

He didn’t say anything. 

“See?” she said quietly. “It isn’t possible.”

He stroked her head. “You should rest.”

She snorted. “I’ve rested enough.”

“You’re still recovering. You’ll recover faster if you’re well-rested.”

He started to move, but Rey reached out and grabbed his hand before he could get up. He looked at her with surprise. “I don’t want you to go,” she whispered.

His face softened. “Then I won’t.”

Rey drifted off to sleep, and true to his word, Ben did not leave. She did not dream this time.

She woke hours later, a foreign presence in the room. Ben was still beside her bed, but his hand was no longer holding hers. He was standing, radiating anger. 

“...none of your concern, General.”

“If that is the same girl who murdered Supreme Leader Snoke, then it is very much my concern what happens to her.”

“The girl is  _ my _ prisoner, and  _ I _ will deal with her.” 

When Rey’s vision swam into focus, she saw a red-haired man with a pale, pinched face scowling at Ben. Ben’s hand was clenched at his side, and Rey could feel how much he wanted to raise it and tug the breath from the other man. For whatever reason, he did not. 

“Just as you dealt with her on Starkiller Base? Or when she killed the Supreme Leader?” the other man sneered.

“ _ I _ am the Supreme Leader now,” Ben said quietly. “And you are overstepping... _ General _ .”

The general gave a short, sharp inclination of the head before he turned on his heel and strode from the room. It wasn’t until the doors swished shut behind him that Ben’s hand unfurled from its fist. 

“Who was that?” she asked.

He looked surprised to see her awake. His expression turned to one of bitterness. “General Hux--my second-in-command. He and I don’t get along.” 

“That’s an understatement. You want to murder each other.”

An almost-smile flickered across his face. “Yes. He won’t last much longer, but he’s crucial to a project at the moment.”

She sat up, leaning against the wall. “What happens now, Ben?”

The smile dropped from his face. “Like I said. Whatever you want.” 

“What do  _ you _ want?”

The smile returned, sadder. “You know what I want.”

Rey tilted her head. “The first time we met, you told me you can take whatever you want.”

He looked away. “I don’t want to take this.”

And for some reason, that made Rey feel impossibly sad. “You took me,” she reminded him. “From Endor.”

He inclined his head. “And I’ll take you back, if that’s what you want.”

Except...she  _ didn’t _ want that. Which didn’t make sense at all because that’s what she  _ should _ want. Her friends were probably worried about her. They probably thought she was dead. She had to go back. But...she couldn’t bear to leave him behind again. “Come with me.”

He didn’t say anything, didn’t even react. Just walked out of the room.

Rey felt more alone than ever.

.

She was sleeping again, or close to it, more out of boredom than anything else, when she felt a disturbance outside of her room. She reached for her saber, which Ben had left on a table with her other things; it flew to her hand at the exact moment five stormtroopers burst into her room, blasters raised. General Hux strolled in, hands clasped behind his back. 

“I’m surprised he left you alone,” he said, a tight smirk pulling his face. “No matter--he’ll come rushing to your defense in a moment and my little trap will have worked. Detain her.”

Rey stood up on the bed, igniting her saberstaff. She reached out with the Force.  _ BEN!  _

Perhaps it was the fear radiating from her, because he responded at once.  _ What is it _ ?

_ It’s Hux, he’s here, he’s got stormtroopers-- _

She severed the connection as the first stormtrooper fired, his blaster set to stun. She deflected the blast easily, and the next, but there were five of them and one of her and she was still weak from lying in bed for the last couple of days. She wouldn’t be able to hold her own for long, especially since she quite literally had her back against a wall. 

_ I’m coming, _ Ben was telling her, his energy frantic.  _ Just hang on for a little longer, I’ll be right there _ \--

One of their blasts hit her knee, knocking her off her feet. She cried out as she went down, her saber extinguishing itself.  _ Ben… _

He didn’t answer, because he didn’t need to; right as two of the stormtroopers rushed forward to cuff her, they all heard a roar that could only belong to one person. Rey felt him even before she saw the red glow of his lightsaber, heard the crackling energy as it sliced through the air.

“Shoot him!” Hux howled, but Ben deflected every single blaster shot. The stormtroopers that weren’t hit by the deflected shots were slammed into the walls of Rey’s room; Hux, too, was lifted off his feet, hands clutching his throat.

That was how Ben entered, levitating a choking Hux. His face was full of rage, but when he saw Rey sprawled on her bed, his gaze softened by a fraction. “Did they hurt you?”

“Just stunned my knee.” 

Ben let out a low growl before slamming Hux so hard into the wall that when he slid down to the floor, he was unconscious. 

“They were using me as bait,” she said even as Ben strode to her, gathering her easily in his arms. “Ben, they’ve laid a trap for you--”

“I know,” he said brusquely, carrying her out of the room. “I just killed half a dozen officers on the bridge for attempted mutiny.”

She gaped at him. “All your officers…”

“I’ve suspected it for some time.” He kept his quick pace down the corridor. “But I’ve been too distracted these last couple days to sense them moving up the plan.”

“Because of me,” she said quietly.

He glanced down at her. “Yes,” he said, just as quietly. 

He felt too close then, much too close, so she looked down. “Where are we going?”

“We’re leaving. This goes beyond Hux’s need for control--the entire First Order…” he didn’t finish. 

_ It’s like Luke all over again _ , she thought.  _ Oh, Ben… _

“I don’t want your pity,” he said coldly. “I can take a lot of things from you, Rey, but not that.”

“I’m sorry.” She didn’t know why, but she leaned forward and pressed her lips against the scar on his face. 

He didn’t look at her, but his grip on her tightened. 

The hangar was suspiciously quiet--where there would normally be a flurry of activity, only a few stormtroopers and mechanics wandered the space. 

“It’s a trap,” Ben said. “They’re waiting on my escape craft.” He carried her instead to a TIE Silencer. It was a narrow fit, but she wedged in beside him as he flipped the controls. Stormtroopers began firing as soon as the Silencer started to move, but Ben had them soaring out of the hangar before they could do any real damage. They were out of range before anyone issuing commands realized what was going on. TIE fighters were too small to make the jump to hyperspace, so they headed for the nearest land mass--the forest moon of Endor. 

“The Resistance could still be there,” Rey said quietly.

“They are.” He stared determinedly ahead. “They recovered the base that was built during the Empire.”

“And you were going to attack,” she surmised. 

“The First Order was going to attack, yes,” he said. “Probably still is.”

“What are you going to do?” she asked in a small voice. 

He was quiet for a long moment. “Exactly what you wanted,” he said at last. 

Her heart pounded in her ears. He couldn’t mean helping her take down the First Order. Except...he could. The First Order clearly wanted nothing to do with him...so why wouldn’t he help the Resistance take them down? Well, there  _ was _ the issue of him having been the Supreme Leader of the very thing the Resistance fought against, and even if he wasn’t anymore, Rey had a feeling that the Resistance wouldn’t exactly welcome him with open arms. But that’s what she’d wanted, wasn’t it? She’d told him that she wanted to defeat the First Order with him by her side. And he said he was going to do exactly what she wanted.

They made planetfall, skimming the treetops as Ben searched for a place to land. He found a clearing not far from the base, but the size of his Silencer meant he had to disturb some of the surrounding trees. “We need to move quickly,” he said as he flipped the controls. Rey’s knee was still throbbing from the blaster bolt, but she didn’t have to tell Ben; as soon as he opened the hatch and hopped out, he reached for Rey and swung her easily into his arms. 

“Can’t you just heal my knee with the Force?” she asked as he set off through the jungle. 

“I will, when we’re not sitting right next to the only TIE Silencer that isn’t present and accounted for in the First Order fleet.” 

“You have a point. I’m just worried I’m tiring you out.”

His lips quirked. “You weigh next to nothing--carrying you isn’t strenuous.”

“Oh.” It was true he didn’t seem phased about carrying her for so long, but still she worried.

“I carried your dead weight on Takodana and didn’t break a sweat,” he said, as if reading her mind. “Trust me, Rey, this is no hardship.”

“If you say so.”

He hesitated. “Do you...not like when I carry you?”

“It’s not that I don’t like it,” she was quick to assure him. “It’s just...I’m not used to feeling...helpless.”

Ben snorted. “You are  _ far _ from helpless.”

“Thank you, but it’s hard not to feel that way when I’m too weak to walk so a  _ massive _ man has to carry me and tell me I weigh next to nothing.”

“Fair point.” 

There was silence between them for a long moment. Rey heard birds in the trees, heard the groaning of trees shifting in the earth. The Empire had died here on Endor, a simple forest moon inhabited only by small creatures called Ewoks. It was the Ewoks who had aided the worn and wearied Rebellion while Luke Skywalker defeated Emperor Palpatine and Darth Vader. Maybe, Rey thought, the First Order could be defeated here too. 

“Did you mean what you said?” she asked. “Are you really going to help the Resistance take down the First Order?”

“Why not? I don’t want the First Order to succeed.” 

“But the Resistance wants you…”

“Dead?”

“Well,” she said. “Yes.”

“The Resistance needs me, whether or not they’re willing to admit it. I know too much for them to turn me away.” It was true that if anyone had valuable information, it was the former Supreme Leader. But if his own men had turned on him, it seemed plausible that they hadn’t been completely honest with him--so how valuable was his information really? 

Well, the Resistance didn’t need to know the particulars. They would have Ben, and that would be enough.

Ben slowed to a halt by a mossy log, gently setting Rey down upon it. He knelt before her, removing his glove before splaying his hand over her knee. Rey felt warmth radiating from his fingertips, felt a prickling energy there too. The Force, flowing through her and healing her. There wasn’t much to heal and it was over in a moment, but the numb throbbing in her knee had disappeared and she felt fit and ready to walk again. 

“How do you do that?” she asked.

Ben pulled his glove back onto his hand. “I only act as a conduit--the Force is what heals you. Or rather, the Force accelerates the natural healing process.”

“But you  _ use _ the Force to heal.”

“Yes.”

She stood up, walking in a small circle. Her knee felt fine. “Can you use the Force to heal yourself?”

“There are accounts, from before, of Jedi using the Force to heal themselves, but that knowledge has been lost. I have heard that it can be life-threatening to attempt it.”

Rey wondered if that was why he still bore the scar she’d given him. But the First Order had bacta and medical droids--he could’ve gotten rid of the scar if he’d really wanted to. 

_ But he didn’t want to _ . 

It could’ve been an homage to Snoke, whose own face had been so split and ravaged that he was more scar than man. But Rey felt that maybe it was more than that. Like the wound in his side that he’d beaten over and over while they fought in the woods. This was the same man who, only a moment ago, carried her in his arms after healing her wounds. How could he inflict so much suffering on himself and be so gentle with her?

“You know how,” he said quietly.

She flushed. “My thoughts…”

“It’s as I said, Rey. We’re bound. You’re a part of me as much as I’m a part of you.” He moved closer to her, brushed his thumb over her cheek. “You can read my thoughts, too. If you want.”

“I don’t want to.”

“You do.” He tilted his head. “But you’re afraid to.”

She shut her eyes and let the Force surge through her, probing into his mind. She saw their hands touching for the first time, saw his hand extended to hers in the throne room. She felt his hope and his anguish, his fear when he saw her wounded, his anger when General Hux tried to take her. She felt him now, too, his feelings so loud and so varied that it took her a long moment to pick them apart. Fear. Desperation. Anguish.

Love.

She opened her eyes and found herself looking straight into his.  _ You love me _ .

_ Yes. _

“I,” she started to say, but the words wouldn’t come from her lips. 

“I know,” he said, brushing her cheek again. Then he bent his head.

Rey closed her eyes a moment before his lips touched hers. She felt the fear and desperation and anguish and above all, the  _ love _ . He had so much to give. 

She didn’t know what waited for them, but as long as he was by her side, it didn’t matter. She would brave anything with him. 


End file.
